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Hmm... the idea seems interesting, but I am not sure things were well thought out from an execution standpoint. Much of it came off as rushed, and it was difficult to figure out what exactly was going on at the end.

Also, the recording quality was pretty low. It was hard to hear, and it had a very 'echo-ey' feel to it. It might be a good idea to look into your setup for improving the quality - there are a lot of easy fixes to create solid recordings.

With that said, I think with a little more work, there could be something pretty good. Just needs a little more time and effort...

Ha ha. Nice - it was funny and moved along at a nice pace. Plus, I liked the punchline/ slogan at the end. Good job.

Pretty bizarre humor - I know some people aren't fans of the random humor, but I like it. The overall animation was pretty basic... nothing overly complex. Although, I thought the facial animation was pretty solid.

I am wondering why the person on the right was carrying a briefcase. Yet again, considering the context of the short, I suppose it fits in with everything else. Bottom line, I enjoyed it. Good job.

UNP responds:

My willingness to create animations is far more higher than a highest mountain
The only challenge, though
Is my scope of understanding...
Ideas, full of emptiness and random...
The storyline for this particular achievment of mine
Was made up in a time lapse
No longer than a capture of a thief
Caught on king's demand
Again and again I say it once more
I can do better, you'll just have to wait
A day on or of abroad

Nice - quick and to the point.

If anything, I would recommend in the future using some additional sound effects to better sell the largest tank crushing Heavy tank (and maybe have something to go along with Light tank's small pellet fires). Other than that, nice job.

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Capullet responds:

Thank you ) will try for better sound effects in next videos =)

The ending came out of left field, however, that might have been what you were going for - not sure I really got it, though. With that said, I really liked the animation as well as the direction. The music was also a nice complement to things.

I don't know if you thought about it, but I was wondering, how did he die? Seems like that could be a pretty funny story in and of itself.

HMarioProductionsH responds:

maybe make a second part to the story more complete, thanks for commenting

Funny premise - quick and to the point gag. I also liked the piano at the start of it.

If there was one thing that could have been improved, it was the walk cycle of the guy. It could have been tighter (not to mention better convey he was tired). Not sure how much effort you wanted to put into it, but maybe that's something to consider in the future.

With that said, good job!

HMarioProductionsH responds:

thanks for the review I should have given more effort to walk cycle but taketh my upcoming animations measures

I really like the story - it's creative and kept me interested. However, I think the short's flow struggles at times because there is so little animation (the fight scene being the only part with any real animation). There was also a lot of dead audio space. I think things could have been spruced up with some background music just to keep the pace moving.

With that said, I think this is a great start. In addition to the story, and the characters you have are also pretty interesting. I have a feeling this could be just one story in a series of multiple...

I didn't realize until reading the description that the teacher takes on a different persona when his eyes blink. I like the idea, but perhaps it could have been better revealed with the animation/ sound that he 'transforms' into somebody else.

As a side note, the audio a little low at times. You might want to try to boost it up a little in the future.

I am interested to see the next part(s) - I want to see what happens to Mr. Sanders going forward.

tredaycartoons responds:

thanks for your advice this was an animated proect i did for a customer so followed what they wanted but i thank you for your advice

I like the idea and the punchline. However, I think it was a little confusing. I assume the lizard in the middle thought the other lizard was interested in it but was really digging the third lizard.

One suggestion that might have cleared things up a little would have been to have the middle lizard and the other lizard in the same shot in the beginning to help better set the scene for what's going on.

Still, I think you had a good idea going. Also, I enjoyed the music during the lizard's push ups!

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Not bad - short, sweet, and to the point. Good job.

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n/a, Male

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